The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. (Lk. 6:45)

Because Jesus was pure and sincere (Heb. 7:26), He did not use manipulative tactics in His communication.  He refused to use flattery to get the religious leaders to follow Him.  He did not candy-coat what it would be like to be His disciple when people asked about it just to bump up the number of followers.

Because Jesus was true, truth itself (Jn. 14:6), He could not be deceptive in His communication.  He told the disciples what to expect.  He even told them how He genuinely felt (i.e., grieved in spirit).  He said what was hard for people to hear rather than try to smooth it over to make them feel better.

Because Jesus was humble, gentle, and meek (Matt. 11:29), He was not pretentious or pompous in His communication.  He spoke in ways people would understand, not using high and lofty words just so people would realize how great He was.

Implications for Us in Ministry:

Check your motivations.

Though God Himself in the flesh, Jesus did not hold Himself aloof but rather freely communicated with fallen human beings. He welcomed anyone from tax gatherers and sinners to the self-righteous religious leaders. At either side of the spectrum, these were people who were far from God. How He communicated varied based on who it was but He still permitted all to come to Him.

Though born a Jew, Jesus engaged in communication with Samaritans and Gentile people who approached Him.

Though His ministry primarily focused on adults, Jesus had no problem relating with children as well.  The disciples were the ones who tried to hinder them from coming to Him but Jesus said, “Let the little children come.”

Implications for Us in Ministry:

Position should not separate you. Jesus was willing to leave the glories of heaven behind and humble Himself to come to earth.

If people feel they can’t talk freely with you because of your ministry position, what might you be doing to give that impression?  What can you do to break through preconceived ideas about certain positions?

Prejudices should not define you. Jesus broke through prejudices and cultural norms.  He could be approached by anyone without fear of rejection.

If people feel they can’t approach you without being judged, what might you be doing to give that impression?  What can you do to break through your own bents and biases to accept all people regardless of who they are or what they’ve done?

Purpose should not isolate you. Jesus had a primary target group to whom He ministered but still welcomed others.

If people feel they can’t come to you because you have an agenda that doesn’t include them, what might you be doing to give that impression?  What can you do to break through a narrow view to the big picture perspective of God’s overall purpose to love Him and love others?

Jesus spoke to crowds of at least 4,000 to 5,000. Between his speaking schedule, training of the Twelve, healing and miracles, Jesus was one busy person. He was on a mission, clear on His purpose. Yet, He was not so busy or so intent on meeting His agenda that He didn’t have time to communicate with individuals as well as the masses.

Implications for Us in Ministry:

Examine your heart. Jesus cared about both the individual and the masses.  And, people mattered to Jesus more than tasks.

• Do you value individuals or are you so consumed with ministering to larger groups that you have little time or concern for one-on-one?
• Do you value the person knocking on your door, sending an e-mail, or calling on the phone more than the tasks you are trying to accomplish?
• Do you value connecting with people or begrudge the time it takes?

Examine your purpose. In the final analysis, Jesus knew that it was about loving God and loving people (Matt. 22:37-40).

• Even if you have more task-oriented spiritual gifting, are you aware of the people around you?
• Even if you are drawn to serving a specific target group of people, are you open to others?
• Even if you lead a big church, are you seeking to connect with individuals?

Examine your schedule. Jesus accomplished more in His three years of ministry than all of us combined will in a lifetime, yet He was still able to stop and spend time with the Father and with individuals.

• Does your schedule reflect what Jesus views as important?
• Do you build margins of time into your schedule to be available for the unexpected or are you so busy you can’t fit people in?

Many accounts in the Gospels show Jesus addressing people’s concerns before they spoke. In other situations, Jesus was a step ahead of what they were saying, ready to take the conversation to the next level. He had an awareness of people’s needs that enabled Him to communicate in ways that truly spoke to the moment. He was aware of their thoughts and what was in their hearts. Consider Luke 5:17-26 –

“When Jesus saw their faith, he said, ‘Friend, your sins are forgiven.’” (Lk. 5:20)

Notice that Jesus “saw” their faith. Friends of a paralytic man went to great effort to bring this man to Jesus. Scripture does not record the paralytic lowered through the roof saying a word, nor his friends. Jesus didn’t have to be God to know they had faith. He observed their actions.

“The Pharisees and the teachers of the law began thinking to themselves, ‘Who is this fellow who speaks blasphemy? Who can forgive sins but God alone?’ Jesus knew what they were thinking and asked …” (Lk. 5:21-22)

How did Jesus know what they were thinking? Certainly the God-factor enabled Jesus to know people’s thoughts. They might have had stern looks on their faces and arms folded tightly in front of them. Scripture does not say. Or, maybe He noticed who was before Him — Pharisees and teachers of the law. Aware of their backgrounds, Jesus would know the kind of reaction His comment would evoke within them.

Implications for Us in Ministry:

Remember the natural element. Sometimes we simply need to learn to be more observant and develop better listening skills. If you are having difficulty discerning the needs, doubts, fears, etc. in people but know something is wrong, don’t assume. You could say something like, “I notice that …” Don’t be afraid or too proud to ask.

• Could you have avoided problems had you taken time to put yourself in other people’s shoes and anticipated their concerns?
• Could you have been more sensitive in certain situations had you taken note of people’s non-verbal communication (body language, facial expressions, tone of voice)?
• Could you have better helped people if you had set aside your own insecurities and asked people to help you understand?

Remember the fleshly element. Our own backgrounds can cause us to project into a situation that which people do not intend. Our own sin and neediness can get us distracted and make us be less observant than we think we are. Our own biases can cloud our vision and cause us to misinterpret what we see.

• Are you asking God to search your own heart to see if there is any offensive way in you and lead you aright? (Ps. 139:23-24)
• Are you deliberate at ridding yourself of the things that are of the flesh and replacing it with “the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator?” (Col. 3:1-17)

Remember the supernatural element. You might say, “Jesus is the all-knowing God. Of course He would know people’s thoughts.” Let’s be careful not to use that as an excuse. We have supernatural resources to help us become more aware.

• Do you stop and pray that God gives you that wisdom He promised to those who ask? (James 1:5)
• Do you yield your own thoughts and interpretations of situations to the Counselor who is with you and in you? (Jn. 14:16-17)

Jesus would speak like He knew the heart and ways of the Father.

“When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.”  (Matt. 7:28-29)   “They were amazed at his teaching, because his message had authority.”  (Lk. 4:31-32, 36)

Notice how the way Jesus communicated:

1. caused a reaction within the people
2. stood in contrast to others

While Jesus spoke with authority, He was not an authoritarian forcing people to accept His words.  Though all authority belongs to Jesus (Matt. 28:18), He did not merely “tell” people what He knew they needed to hear.  Rather, . . .

Implications for Us in Ministry:

We need Christ’s authority for Christ-like communication. The Apostle Paul instructed the Thessalonians on how to live based on the authority of the Lord Jesus, not his own position or knowledge.  He said, “For you know what instructions we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus” (1 Thess. 4:1).

• Are we careful to differentiate between our own words and that which comes from the Lord?
• Can we back up what we say with the Word?
• Do we rely on the Spirit to speak through us and not our own human wisdom?

We need a Christ’s attitude for Christ-like communication. About Jesus, Philippians 2:6-7 says, “Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.”

• Do we demonstrate humility in our communication?
• Do we engage people even when we know the answers?
• Do we welcome the thoughts of others?

When we combine the authority of Christ with the attitude of Christ in our lives then our communication will also cause a reaction in others and stand in contrast to the world around us.

Why Christ-like communication is imperative for us in ministry:

1) Our words show people what is in our hearts.

The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. (Lk. 6:45)

2)  Our words can build up or tear down the people we serve.

Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. (Prov. 12:18)

The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.  (Prov. 15:4)

Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.  (Prov. 16:24)

3)  Our words can bring ruin to what we do, making what has gone before worthless.

He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.  (Prov. 13:3)

If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. (James 1:26)

4)  Our words can spark problems that spiral out of control and do great damage.

Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.  The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.  (James 3:5-6)

The tongue “is a restless evil, full of deadly poison” (James 3:8).

More for Church Leaders:  Leadership Skills: Communication